I feel as if this, too, will fail the way most things in my life have up until this point. Hell, I even had another blog where I tried to be productive and that...well, I don't think I've actually touched Wordpress in well over six months. It's a lot easier to hide in your bed and browse the netz, you know? Never engaging, always just watching.

But I'm not going to publicize this blog. Not now, and who knows, maybe not ever. It'll be my own private exercise in Can-You-Stick-With-It.

I'm 31, have major depression and anxiety that meds can't always tamp down, and for the last three years life has been kicking me in the gut. Failed career, failed a master's degree, failed living by myself, failed moving to another state, failed and failing at being un-disabled and un-chronically ill, failing job after job, failing my own pets for fuck's sake. My father died suddenly this year and I have decided that I am moving home so my mother doesn't collapse in on herself. We'll see how it all ends up, won't we?

I'm the classic tale of Gen Y failure, except that I've never thought I was too good for minimum wage. I hide behind cynicism and snark. Only a few people know who the real me is anymore, because the real me is hiding underneath the blankets in bed crying due to all the major life failures.

My failures aren't even funny. How's that for failing even worse in the 21st century? So let's see how I fail this blog. Hopefully I'll at least entertain myself.